Today i am cranky, no make that FUMING!
Little man has been doing swimming lessons since he was about 3 months old, he loved the water and i really wanted to encourage water safety and respect. Somewhere along the line though, he sort of stopped liking it.... but i was ok with that, i was willing for him to be less than happy for 20 mins a week for the sake of him being safer around water, and for me to be confident that should the worst happen, he would know what to do.
But then at the start of this term, the school changed his teacher. Gone was our tough but kind teacher, who followed each thing that made little man unhappy with a big hug. In came another teacher.... this one doesnt seem to know how to deal with unhappy or scared kids! Happy kids, not a problem, but one cry and she doesnt have a clue.
We are very much attachment parents in this family, we have worked hard to build respect and trust with our little boy so when the teacher asks me to leave the pool area and threatens H that if he doesnt stop crying Mummy wont be coming back in, it really goes against the grain of what i have always strived to teach him.
Top that off with telling another child not to give H a toy, because he is being naughty, and i damn near had to stop by Dad from decking her :-) He isnt being naughty lady, he is a scared little 2 year old, being pushed around by a grown woman! Perhaps if you tried explaining what you are doing and what you want him to do rather than forcing him you might have more luck! The "is he used to getting what he wants all the time" comment when he wouldnt do what he asked had ME wanting to deck her. NO lady, he certainly doesnt get what he wants all the time, but when it comes to his own body, i have the respect to ask him if it is ok to do something and if he asks me to stop doing something we do. Simple! Would you be thrilled at having someone 3 times your size hold your head under the water! I think not. I think you might be just a little upset yourself....
But today was the end of the line, this woman, whilst holding H in the middle of the pool to work on rolling onto his back to float if he falls in head first, says to a frightened 2 year old, "If you dont roll over, i am going to let go and walk away" Way to go lady, scare the crap out of an already scared little kid. Way to make him feel safe in the water. Do what i say or i will leave you to drown.
So as i said, i am fuming! Unfortunately the director of the school is very hard core herself so i honestly dont think saying something would make any difference at all. We have requested to be moved back to the old teacher from next week and wont be returning to the school next term. It is just not worth watching a normally very laid back, give anything a go kind of kid, clinging to me for dear life when we walk into the pool. That is not what we signed up for and i cant imagine any parent, attachment or not thinking that kind of behaviour is ok. It breaks my heart to see him like that, so enough is enough.
Fingers crossed the new school we try next term will be better. At least they allow me in the pool with him, so we can start to rebuild his confidence and trust.
Ok, rant over :-)